A long time ago, when I would struggle with my faith, I'd talk to God. "If I could only see you," I'd say, "then I'd know for sure." But what was it that I hoped to see? If God actually showed up, right before my very eyes--what would He look like?
The stupefying claim of the gospels is that God did, indeed, appear on our earthly doorstep. He took the form of a man. And much to everyone's surprise, God did not appear as a King or an Emperor or any sort of VIP at all. He "made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant" (Philippians 2:7).
And in case Jesus' disciples had somehow missed the point, in case they failed to recognize the absolutely humble and yielded self-giving of their Master, he was careful to burn the image into their minds. Knowing he was about to die, Jesus left the apostles with a sort of acted-out last-will-and-testament. He revealed the heart and character of God in a way that, yes, they could see with their very eyes. And it wasn't at all what they expected...
There in the warm intimacy of a family-style gathering, as they prepared to eat the Passover meal together, Jesus surprised the followers who thought they already knew him pretty well. Stripping off his outer clothes, Jesus wrapped a towel around his waist and, precisely like a slave, began to wash his friends' dirt-encrusted feet.
Peter, never shy, at first refused. He recoiled at seeing the Master humiliate himself that way. But when Jesus corrected him ("unless I wash you, you have no part with me" - John 13:9), Peter turned on a dime; he made a complete about-face. "Then wash all of me--hands and head as well!"
Jesus understood his disciples' confusion. “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand” (John 13:7). Until they witness his very real, complete and brutal death on the cross, the disciples will not totally understand the incomprehensible extent to which Jesus gives himself away. But even now--on the eve of his crucifixion--the Lord wants his followers to understand something. His self-giving is not only something he will soon do for them; it's something he wants to continue to do through them. They are to receive the life and power of Jesus and, just like their Lord, give themselves away for one another. "I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you" (John 13:15).
As far as John the gospel-teller is concerned, this human low point is a divine high point in Jesus' revelation of himself, of his showing the character of God. Expecting to glimpse God, we anticipate fanfares and and regal status; what we get is humiliation and unashamed servanthood.
God, my own attempts at being humble are so pathetic. I may momentarily lower myself, but I still secretly regard myself as some sort of royalty, merely play-acting at humility. Help me, Lord, to see and accept the shocking humility of Jesus. Let me receive from him, and let me be freed and empowered to do what he does. Help me slip out of the chains of pride and run, fast and free, in the radically beautiful servanthood of Christ.
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What about you? Do you identify with Peter's resistance to the idea that Christ lowers himself to serve you? Are you inspired (or maybe frightened) by the example that Jesus sets for us?
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